If You Knew

If you knew where I was,

Would you come running to me?

If you knew how it hurt,

Would you heal me?

If you knew I was drowning in thoughts,

Would you save me?

If you knew how hard I tried,

Would you appreciate it?

If you knew how many tears I’d shed,

Would you dry them?

If you knew how many hours of sleep I’d lost,

Would you sleep next to me?

If you knew how many smiles I’ve faked,

Would you come and make one worthwhile?

If you knew how many times I’d wished you

were mine,

Would you chose me?

If only you knew,

How much it hurt,

How much it still hurts,

How much it will always hurt,

Maybe then you would come back,

Maybe then you’d realize what you did to me,

Maybe then you’d finally choose me,

Maybe in another life,

You would come running to me,

But,

With a final smile,

And a final breath,

I will say goodbye,

To the world that was so unkind,

To my fragile soul.

G

 O

  O

    D

     B

      Y

       E

        M

        Y

     O

   N

 E

&

 O

  N

    L

     Y

Goodbye my hopeless love.

Lyrics from "Dust and Gold" by Arrows to Athens

Time Stood Still

Time Stood Still

I am from overflowing bookshelves

with bursts of color like a Picasso painting,

From towers and mountains of journals and notebooks

filled with random thoughts, ideas, observations.

I am from the neighbour's magnolia tree

with its large leaves knocking together in the wind

like a child banging wooden learning blocks together.

I’m from the single yellow and pink rose

that visits in the midst of the fifth month.

I am from the medieval castle puzzle

teeming with lords, ladies, and knights,

And from the over thirty barbies I owned.

I’m from enormous, sweet, and soft apricots

that ripened during the summer on Grandpa’s farm.

And aggravating mosquito bites

from playing in the park too late.

I’m from, “Remember, Misho, treat everyone the same.”

I’m from the small European country

between Greece and Romania.

I am from bow shaped pasta

eaten with feta cheese and sugar,

And grape-sized squishy blueberries

which I called bimbam.

I’m from Wingardium LeviOsa, not LeviosA,

From sitting on the couch and saying “Accio Remote!”

and hoping it would really fly into your hand

like a bird flying to its nest.

I am from sarcastic friends and understanding family members,

From in between the pages of books,

where I lose and find myself.

I am from those moments after a long and draining day,

lying on the ground alongside my friends

and laughing over the littlest, most ridiculous things,

until it felt like an ab workout.

In those moments - time stood still.

Wise Lyrics from "A Little Too Much" by Shawn Mendes

I am currently SUPER obsessed with Shawn Mendes. If you don't know who that is,  please be so kind as to leave my blog. These are some lyrics from his song titled "A Little Too Much" from his album "Handwritten".

Fading From Your Mind

Fading From Your Mind

We met at the maple tree.

It was autumn,

Leaves beginning to blush,

Just as my cheeks did when I ran into him.

I’m not sure how it became,

But it was lovely, he was lovely.

He was stalwart and kind.

It is germane at this point,

To say I was in love.

But he began to ignore my class,

He spurned my attempts at conversation.

Until one day, I saw him,

Sitting on the escarpment,

With his arms around another girl.

And suddenly I understood.

Pain like I’ve never felt before,

Violently tore through my heart.

I came home and cried,

Over his sinister actions.

And soon those tears,

Turned to guttural sobs.

The next week was full of lethargy.

I was heartbroken and petulant.

I tried to convince myself,

That it was okay,

But I couldn’t countenance it any longer.

I lay awake at night,

Staring at the moon,

The curtains flow,

Looking like ghosts,

As the keening wind wails.

And I just lay there,

With a hand over my mouth,

Tears streaming down my no-longer blushing cheeks,

And try to be silent,

So I do not wake my family.

And I cry,

Because I know a part of me will always love you.

Maybe we feel empty,

Because we leave a piece of ourselves,

In everything we’ve ever loved.

You will forever be the person,

That I look for in a crowded room.

But

 I

 Can

   Feel

     Myself

       Slowly

         Fading

            From

               Your

                 Mind